Originally posted in my other blog on June 20 2012
I’m a beliber, a Justin Beiber fan. Alot of girls love him, and alot more people hate him, (why??) but there is this one girl who made a JB fan video that’s going viral on youtube. She’s got another one singing call me maybe, but the one I linked is the first one. She’s insane and this got me thinking about the stuctures of jealous girlfriends. Are they really just looking out for their partners, or are the sociopaths in the making?
The girl isn’t really insane, she’s been accused of trolling, and as far as I know, is nameless. Some comments say she’s an actress or an extra for some show, and if it’s true (because all youtube comments are so accurate) then she’s going to win big one day at the Oscars.
So in my 6 years of dating (I’m 20,) I’ve come across the different types of bad girlfriends, none are as extreme as the fanatic, but they’re each bad on their own. And the way I see it, you either have a crazy girlfriend, know a crazy girlfriend or are a crazy girlfriend.So here are the top 4.
Problem:The Jealous girlfriend: Guys say that if she’s jealous, it means she cares and vice versa, but there’s a fine line between jealous of other girls flirting (in which case she has to be reminded that her partner is friendly and wouldn’t intentionally hurt her,) and constantly texting and calling and physically stalking.
Solution: Like I said, she has to be reminded that nothing will happen, and that her issues are in her head. if she constantly has to be reminded that nothing will happen, it can be lack of trust in the relationship or lack of confidence in herself for thinking she’s not enough to, well, keep her man. if talking doesn’t work, then break up. plain and simple.
Example: My boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend is insanely jealous. it’s almost not fair, and even though I’ve tried talking to her, she seems to know how annoying and stuff she is, but she doesn’t stop. she knows how to play and manipulate her (now ex) boyfriend’s emotions which bring me to my next example.
Problem: The Perpetually Angry girlfriend: If she’s always in a bad mood, remind yourself why you’re with her in the first place because no one likes a downer, even though misery loves company. It’s even worse if everything you do is just completley stupid and wrong in her eyes. If she wan’t always like that (like she’s going through a hard time) then try and be there for her, even if she pushes you away. Be sure you have a limit though, don’t be a punching bag or she will totally take advantage of that.
Solution: Try and plan something special for her, make it known that she’s not alone during whatever she’s going through. If she keeps up her negativity, then give her an ultimatum, either her attitude changes or you leave. No point in wasting time on something that clearly won’t work out.
Example: In the Nickelodeon show Victorious, good looking couple Beck and Jade always argue, most of the time Jade, the angry goth girl, starts fights, she’s shown to be jealous, possessive and among other things, mean. Anyway, Beck, the hot brooding guy, breaks up with her because he couldn’t take another fighting match. If things don’t change for the better over a period of time, then get out.
Problem: The Clingy Girlfriend: It’s one thing to kiss someone goodbye like you’ll never see them again, it’s another thing to kiss them like that when they’re going to the bathroom. This is actually the one kind of girl that scares away guys the most, in my opinion (and experience). No one wants anyone that’s clingy and won’t let you breathe air unless you’re taking a huge breath of it before she pulls you back under to keep kissing. it’s too much! you’ll feel smothered, and over time, resentful of her constantly being there. There are somethings in life you have to do alone, like pooping.
Solution: Be completely honest with them and make it clear that their actions are making you uncomfortable. Most of the time, the clingy ones are the most sensitive, so try not to have anyone burst into tears because they feel like you’re rejecting them. In my experience, the clingy-ness comes from either seperation anxiety or abandonment issues of some kind. My only advice is to be honest and get to the bottom of this before she smothers you to death in your sleep. (they tend to be the slightly demented kind, ie: the “If-I-can’t-have-you-no-one-can” mentality..)
Example: I went out on a date with this one guy who was nice enough, but could not stop trying to hold me. It sounds like nothing but it was kind of annoying. we went to the movies and it was at a theater where the arm rests don’t move, so for half the movie he tried holding me every way possible, and kissing my hands, cheeks and even trying to seduce me alittle (blowing into a girls’ ear is not or will ever be sexy!!) I wondered if it was his first date. we’re still friends but I’m sooo not going out with him again. I missed half the movie!
Problem: The crazy girlfriend: The kind of girlfriend that inspired me to write this post, besides the fan video. she twists your words, tries (and fails) to play your emotions and probably brings up having kids on the first date, among other things. This is a pretty broad label because there are so many different sub-genres of crazy, that some might consider to be normal so the only solution I have is this:
Solution: Aside from using the hot-to-crazy scale invented by Bro Code follower Barney Stinson (How I met your mother) if you feel she’s alittle extreme, let her know in the most gentle way imaginable. this doesn’t mean to take her to Disney world to break up, that is a brutal way to end things and you deserve what you have coming if you do go down that path!
Example: I have a friend, let’s call her Caitlyn. She’s oh so in love with her boyfriend, let’s call him Phil. Phil loves her back, but she loves him way way way more than he does,(it shows because she’s made me watch dozens of videos of him eating the doritos locos taco and feign laughter at his reaction.) anyway, they’ve lived 20 minutes away from each other their entire relationship, they’re both transferring to different schools up north, giving them a choice of long distance or breaking up in the future. until then, Caitlyn refuses to leave his side for more than a day, going as far as paying for a ticket to go see her family in New York for Easter. In my opinion he’s in denial about their relationship, they’re going to do long distance, but because they fight alot over the smallest things (and she still loves him anyway) they’re bound for a break up. she’s crazy about him, and I suspect she’ll be crazier without him. he brought out her obsessive side, and she reminds me of me in high school with my ex, we argued over all the things they did and still do. That’s why I don’t doubt their break up…) anyway if you feel she’s alittle too much into you than you are to her, then break it off, otherwise, you’re Phil. you love her, but you’re not in love with her. don’t think I can’t tell the difference, asshole.
There’s a ton of different girls out there, everyone has their baggage, just find someone willing to help out with it. don’t waste time in an unfixable relationship, because the longer you drag it out, the less likely things will ever be civil between you two again.
Just some friendly advice from the relationship observer.
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